My baby is 4 months old today. I can barely believe that it has been that long already...or that short. Depends on how you want to look at it - and even if you aren't a parent, you probably know the feeling. But for some reason, with my little one's four month milestone today, I am feeling reflective and slightly introspective as I look back on four months that have been some of the most blest.
For those of you who know me, I like sleep. I LOVE sleep. There is nothing I love more than a warm bed, comfy blanket, and a nap (or good night's sleep or anything that involves me closing my eyes). But having a baby changed that at first. I wasn't going to be able to do that. But you know what, I didn't mind. Admittedly, only being able to nap for the first couple of weeks wasn't pretty. But life changes and babies inevitably grow. Now my baby sleeps 10 to twelve hours a night and I feel great.
But it is that little bit about inevitably growing that is sometimes the best and hardest part about my time as a parent thus far. It is amazing watching him grow. I love it - Corby and I often comment on how amazing it is that he is already developing so many skills and is so expressive. But another part of me wants to be able to hold on to these baby moments forever. I love the feeling of holding my child and feeling his head slowly get heavy as he falls asleep in my arms. Or listening to his little attempts at talking and watching the spit bubbles come instead. =P (you have no idea how cute and gross it can be sometimes)
Anyway - the point is that I am realizing a greater lesson about myself. I never realized before how discontent I was with so many things until I realized that I was already wishing for a stage other than the one my baby is currently in. And as I thought about it a little bit more, I realized that I had that attitude through many other things. Paul in Philippians talks about being content in all situations, whether full or hungry, when succeeding or failing. Now Paul's situation at that point is a bit different than mine but I realized that I need to change my attitude. God has blessed me with a family, home, and work for my husband and myself - all good and perfect gifts from above. Instead of being thankful and drinking in every single moment, I get stuck in ruts and moan and groan over what is not to my liking. Thank God for His patience with my discontentedness.
So to any new mommies out there (or anyone else who finds themselves a little discontented with where you are currently in life - you just might have to adjust the analogy a little bit), know that the sleepless nights will not last forever nor will your baby always be this small. Treasure the moments you have and know that whether easy or hard, there are things you will never get back again and enjoy what you have been given.
Happy 4 month birthday, my baby. Your mom and dad love you and wouldn't change anything.
